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Let me precede this review by saying that most critics, especially the ones that work for the big sites and one that works for a particular action site, has extremely large sticks surgically implanted in their asses. I’m sorry but somewhere in my many years on this Earth people have quite literally forgotten what going to a summer popcorn blockbuster was supposed to be like. In short, it’s supposed to be ridiculous fun and it’s supposed to make you forget about the real world for a few hours as you watch a British born action star proceed to kick, stab and blow up prehistoric sharks.
Yes, if you haven’t figured it out yet, this is a review for the Jason Statham led sequel Meg 2: The Trench which is the follow up to the one where The Stath stabs a prehistoric shark in the eyeball with a spear. Yes that one so you pretty much know what you’re getting yourself into when you go into watch this movie. And what is that? Well, more of the same but amped up because this is a sequel and it’s go bigger or go home.
In terms of plot, Statham returns as elite diver Jonas Taylor and this time along with Cliff Curtis, Shuya Sophia Cai, and Page Kennedy from the first one with international action star Wu Jing (Wolf Warrior franchise) joining the cast as the brother of character played by Bingbing Li who has sadly passed since the events of the last movie. Taylor and crew are once again on a mission to make a dive into the deepest depths of the ocean that he ever been seen by human eyes before. Unfortunately, things go awry of course as a ruthless mining operation plagues their expedition and threatens their lives as more prehistoric megaladons as well as other lethal creatures are unleashed forcing Jonas to not just battle nature this time around but also man.
Yep, standard plot and this time we have human antagonists to throw into the mix giving The Stath and Jing plenty to contend with during the film’s 2 hour drumming time. Taking over in the director’s chair is Free Fire’s Ben Wheatley who is totally game on delivering the most bonkers and insane adventure yet for Jonas and company. Wheatley assumes at winking and nudging at the audience hoping that those who want to have fun with a movie actually will. I was one of those and yes I had a blast. Sue me.
Spoilers Alerts will ensue here because I have to talk about certain aspects of the movie to defend it as to why you should see it. If you haven’t yet, then stop reading and join us after you have partaken in all the monster action and fun.
First off, my biggest gripe with the first film is that Statham didn’t get to do any of his signature fighting. I know, I know, it was a movie about the star fighting a colossal shark but we could have at least gotten a bar fight to satisfy our needs for Statham action.
Well, this one makes up for it as the opening has Taylor investigating pirates who are dumping radio wastes into the ocean. His mission to gather evidence and photos doesn’t go as planned and Jonas must fight his way off the ship with some nifty close quarters hand to hand wizardry. Right from there, I had a smile on my face from ear to ear. Statham gets ample opportunity throughout to bust some heads so fans will get their Stath fighting fix for sure.
While Statham gets to pummel so bad guys, I’m sad to say that Wu Jing does not as his character is more of a scientist and he does get in on the action but it’s not of the martial arts variety. I felt it was a wasted opportunity as more main stream moviegoers could have seen what we action buffs have known for years. Wu Jing is a legit action film fighting threat and it’s a shame more people won’t see that.
Wu Jing does get plenty of heroic action however which includes the star diving out of a helicopter and taking on a rather large Kraken. Yes there’s also a giant octopus as well as some deadly lizard looking dinosaurs that look like they came out of a Jurassic World movie. Jing is clearly having fun here and he still demonstrates his physicality to the max.
The bad guys are clearly one note with Sienna Guillory hamming it up as the ruthless CEO of the corporation that is sabatoging the oceans and Jonas’ expedition. I could have done without her character but it was fun to see you get taken off by the lizards as she’s screaming while wailing away with a machine gun.
Rambo: Last Blood’s Sergio Peris-Mencheta serves his purpose as the mining operation’s head ruthless mercenary Montes. He, of course, has issues with Jonas as Taylor was responsible for him going to jail so he makes it his life’s goal to kill our hero at all cost. Sergio is more comic bookish here in terms of villainy and he gets a satisfying death which I’ll talk about soon.
Meg 2 is never boring and I’ve read some people say that there wasn’t enough Megalodon action and that couldn’t be further from the truth. The prehistoric sharks are well represented and we even get some tasty sequences of them chomping down on helpless victims. It’s all bloodless throughout but I was having extreme fun with it and laughed out in a good way several times.
The addition of the other creatures will surely be hit or miss with many but I never had a problem with the additions and just thought it added to the carnage and mayhem that we payed for. Sequels are always looking to out do the previous outings so why the hell not.
The finale is all sorts of batshit crazy as The Stath breaks out into full on…well… Stath mode which sees our priceless action star manning a jet ski and taking on the sharks with explosive tip harpoons. This is all believable in my eyes because it’s Statham who can essentially walk on water in my eyes.
Curtis, Kennedy and company also get plenty to do and there’s a lot of levity as they all take on the mercenaries who get their just dos by becoming food for all the creatures.
Now it’s the ending that is flawless in my opinion as Taylor takes on Montes which culminates in our hero virtually kicking him into the mouth of a Meg. That’s right. Statham blasts the bad guy with a lethal front kick which catapults him into the jaws of the raging beast. How the hell can you not love this shit?
Statham puts the cherry on top as he takes on the final Meg which reminded me of Roy Scheider’s heroic stand from Jaws 2. Similar to that ending, Statham grabs a helicopter propeller, yes you heard me right, a propeller and proceeds to stab the shark to finish him off. Once again, how the hell can you not have fun with this fucking movie. I mean Statham kicks a guy into a shark, kicks a Meg in its snout and then offs it by ramming a propeller blade into it. What’s not to love.
Overall, I could talk more about the cinematography, the music, the music and other things and pick it apart with its flaws but seriously, why? Meg 2 is a perfect summer popcorn movie just like the Fast & Furious films that get ripped apart. I remember going to the movies during the summer as a child and watching absurd and full films all the time and I think this generation is lost on all of it.
I did want to see more gore like they were saying while the movie was being made but I get it. They want to make money off of this so PG-13 means more ages can see it. We still get to see some gnarly deaths and once again, The Stath kicks a guy into a shark and slams a shark with a propeller blade. That’s all after taking them on with a jet ski and killing the sharks in perfect slow-mo fashion while riding a large wave. Only Statham can pull this off and he’s definitely a bona fide action star reminiscent of the 80’s and 90’s.
Meg 2: The Trench is lethal popcorn movie entertainment that will be enjoyed by those of us that get it. It’s absurd, makes no sense, ridiculous and just plain dumb fun so throw your brain out at the door, grab the largest soda and tub of popcorn you can find and reveal in The Stath doing what The Stath does best.
VERDICT: 4 Ou of 5 Stars, that’s right…4…I had a total blast with this movie and it’s an example of why summer at the movies is done much damn fun.
ACTION-FLIX APPROVED and ESSENTIAL!
Meg 2 Features Starham Kicking a Guy into a Shark…Enough Said!!!
